點入購買【拉子時代】

串聯每部電影和每段感情的時空背景

Sarah Waters:粉絲集中營

有關華老師的書評、影評、動態,豐富又多樣,這裡是中文網站最狂熱的一站。

人物故事: 友同友直友多聞

特別喜歡考古,網路上找不到的中文資料,從英文大海裡找出來。

電影和電視,橘色眼光來說戲

講電影的網站太多了,這裡只談同志主題,專注到好像是世上只有同志影片。

社會: 電腦看久了,總得走出門外

不喜歡談政治,但是很生氣明明一樣繳稅,權利就是矮一階。

2010/08/28

All About Love


台式女女片暫告一段落,換換港式口味:《得閒炒飯》,導演許鞍華,演出:吳君如+周慧敏

2010/08/26

google-site-verification

google-site-verification: googleec83b276e318a058.html

2010/08/24

Julie's Fingersmith

Lang朗姊前幾天告訴我這幅插圖,出現在法國部落格Djou's Blog,取材自Fingersmith原著結尾:窗外天色昏暗,落雨不斷,倆人在火爐前,席地而坐,就著燭光,Maud用她令人魂牽夢引的聲音開始喃喃念起....當然畫者跳過了念稿,直接到了下一階段。( 注意:火爐上方是鏡子倒映窗外落雨)

我寫了email向畫者Julie M.自我介紹,並請她同意轉刊這幅圖。她很爽快地答應,但是對我寫這部改編影片有點意見:
I saw you wrote about the movie Fingersmith. Actresses are great but the adaptation...is so dreadful!

如果當初拍片找她當場景設計,說不定會更忠於原著?雖然我把圖借來放,但我建議你過去看看。因為原文下方有配樂。

另外,我建議可以看看她的其他作品,有些是描述拉子伴侶的生活。雖然語文不通,但是別有歐式風格。(右圖是順手牽過來的)

2010/08/23

Beyond the drama of Anne Lister:Supplement C

要說是Anne Lister系列的補充委實牽強,這篇較像是瑪莉皇后的衍伸.

在Beyond the drama of Anne Lister:Part 7 最後有一張插圖值得介紹一下。標題為:"Love-à-la-mode, or Two dear friends",作者為英國插畫家James Gillray(1757–1815)。他最擅長於政治與社會的反諷作品,在法國大革命與拿破崙時期,隔海發揮不小的影響力。

這幅畫的左邊女主角是影射Queen Maria Carolina of Naples (1752–1814)那不勒斯皇后瑪莉卡羅琳娜,右邊是Emma, Lady Hamilton(1761–1815)艾瑪漢彌頓爵士夫人

圖中女子正卿卿我我:"Little does he imagine that he has a female rival" (他根本不知道他有女性情敵).樹叢後方一位神似Nelson將軍的男子說道:"What is to be done to put a stop to this disgraceful Business?" (該怎麼制止這項不名譽的情事?)另一位男子接口:"Take her from Warwick" (把她帶離華威   )

為什麼插畫家要畫這幅女女漫畫?

我們先來復習一下歐洲歷史.Naples(那不勒斯)位居現今意大利的南方.1860年之前的意大利有許多封建勢力,從北到南分屬於不同的王國,輪流被歐洲幾個大國劃入勢力範圍.南義稍後成為西班牙、奧地利的屬地,主要分為西西里和那不勒斯兩國.

瑪莉卡羅琳娜(右圖)是奧地利的公主,也就是法國瑪莉皇后的姊姊.她也是歐洲皇室政治婚姻的棋子,為了西班牙與奧地利的關係,嫁給那不勒斯國王Ferdinand(費迪南).

但這位瑪莉皇后比較強勢,她插手政務,排除異己,享有極大的政治權力.通常這樣的女性絕不會受到當時社會所喜愛.瑪莉皇后一直想擺脫西班牙的影響,為了合縱連橫,她選擇與英國結盟.這個策略意外讓皇后與艾瑪漢彌頓夫人聲息相通.

艾瑪為英國人,出身貧困,年輕時做過女僕,當過舞者,還為畫師充作模特兒。她長得非常美艷(左圖),被一位爵士看上,雇用她在自家派對娛樂賓客,甚至裸身table dance。可想而知,後來她成為爵士的情婦,還生下一女。

她認識了其中一位賓客 Charles Francis Greville (1749–1809),是古老貴族Warwick的年輕傳人。她認為兩人相愛,期望明媒正娶,於是離開爵士。卻再度成為另一個男人的情婦。他倒是教導艾瑪許多東西,例如上流社會的禮儀,還讓她成為畫家George Romney的模特兒.畫家為她創作多幅美麗人像,艾瑪逐漸在上流社交圈闖出名堂,成為知名的交際花.

Greville雖是貴族,不過手頭急需現金,他打算娶進富有的妻子,根本不可能娶艾瑪為妻.等到婚事快要談定了,他為了擺脫艾瑪以及解決自己的債務,1786年竟然央求自己的叔叔Sir William Hamilton (1731–1803) 漢彌頓爵士接手.

漢彌頓爵士是英國派駐那不勒斯的外交使節,他的第一任妻子已去世,當然願意再娶小他30歲的年輕女子續弦,更何況她的交際手腕能幫助他拓展關係.於是1791年,艾瑪得到名份,成為漢彌頓爵士夫人.

在她所拓展的關係中,有兩位重要人物,一位是那不勒斯的瑪莉皇后,另一位是英國傳奇的海軍大將Horatio Nelson(1758-1805).

1789年法國大革命爆發,漢彌頓夫人向瑪莉皇后提供不少建言,影響那不勒斯的政治態度,於是皇后確立反對革命的立場,與西西里王國成立反法同盟,並與英國保持友好。

1793年漢彌頓夫人初識納爾遜將軍,他正在集結反法勢力,漢彌頓爵士熱情款待英雄同鄉,並幫助他尋求當地政府奧援,他也在沒有英國援助之下,為皇室平復當地的革命勢力。接著納爾遜將軍征戰多年,立下許多戰功。在1798年Battle of the Nile,雖然擊敗法軍,但失去了一臂一眼。他再度來到那不勒斯,受到漢彌頓爵士歡迎,並由夫人親自照顧療養。或許是英雄美人相惜,兩人墜入情網,而漢彌頓爵士則是一旁睜一眼閉一眼。兩人情事傳遍歐洲。

納爾遜將軍和長官之間的關係有點緊張,甚至一度抗命不想回到英國,而是借住瑪莉皇后的行宮。這難免給好事者想像空間,漢彌頓夫人是不是與瑪莉皇后有特殊關係,為了皇后向納爾遜將軍施展美人計?但隨著漢彌頓爵士回任,三個人便一齊回到英國,甚至同住在一起。漢彌頓夫人在1801年為納爾遜將軍產下一女。1803年漢彌頓爵士去世,但因納爾遜將軍未與原配達成離婚協議,兩人始終沒有機會結婚。1805年,納爾遜將軍在Battle of Trafalgar大敗法軍,但重傷不治。英國政府什麼都沒留給漢彌頓夫人,她最後貧病交錯而死。

再回頭來檢視“為什麼插畫家要畫這幅女女漫畫?” 看來是出於畫家的反諷,還有傳統男性對於女性權力的鄙視。如果有任何女性擁有強大的影響力,總被披上某種陰謀論。在法國大革命那段期間,叫做瑪莉皇后的女性,就算怎麼看都不可能有女同傾向,全都逃不掉被抹黃的命運。

2010/08/18

First Trailer of Black Swan

Natalie Portman 娜塔莉波曼的新片預告終於登場,國外媒體的反應是Beautifully horrifying!

2010/08/13

Beyond the drama of Anne Lister:Supplement B

法國大革命的恐同迫害插曲

以前的教課書提到法國大革命的成因,不外乎是路易十六昏庸無能,皇后揮霍,國家財政不佳,強行徵稅引起民怨,最後導致暴動....我最近在看一本薄薄的小書《大革命之前的法國》,用較寬廣的史觀角度分析法國大革命的遠因。簡而言之,法國大革命的背景因素是老式國家機器的管理效能和方式趕不上經濟、社會、文化的演變。國王雖然難辭其咎,卻不是原因的總合。但王室畢竟是最明顯的箭靶,皇后(左圖)Marie Antoinette瑪莉安東尼(1755﹣1793)更成為最好攻擊的標的物。

皇后來自奧地利,為了兩國和平而決定的政治婚姻。然而法國人就是不喜歡奧地利,始終無法接納皇后。在革命初期,反對皇室人士有計劃地印製八卦傳單散播皇后的醜聞,除了文字還附上插圖。內容從她揮霍浪費,一直講到亂搞男女關係。尤以淫亂題材最具殺傷力,於是出現皇后男女通吃的流言。

皇后有兩位閨中密友,一位是Duchesse de Polignac 波利內公爵夫人,本名:Yolande Martine Gabrielle de Polastron(1749–1793).Polignac是法國貴族的姓氏,家族位於法國南部Polastron.

公爵夫人非常漂亮(見右圖),皇后在1775年初次見到她,驚為天人.其實路易十六也有意為年輕的皇后找些同伴,排遣她的孤獨.於是皇室執意要公爵夫人一家搬到凡爾賽宮附近,還為她們打理龐大的安置費用,幫她丈夫安排官位.

一般人認為公爵夫人是壞朋友,誘導皇后吃喝玩樂,因此八卦傳單最愛影射兩人有不可告人之事(如下面插圖,圖片來源,BTW,這是個有關瑪莉安東尼的法文討論版,可以挖到很多寶).但是越讀一些文章,越覺得這是當時有心人士抹黃的技倆.通常我樂於接受名人的女女傳聞,但就瑪莉安東尼的流言,我認為動機可議,手法不足可取。如果你想看一些辯駁,可以參考:Madame de Polignac and the Politics of Calumny


另一位被影射的人物是Princesse de Lamballe 朗巴爾王妃(左圖),本名:Maria Teresa Luisa of Savoy(1749﹣1792)。與公爵夫人差不多同時成為皇后的伴友。史料上記載朗巴爾王妃有才學,個性較為拘謹,但深受皇后喜愛,使她成為八卦傳單攻擊的人物。

王妃的遭遇令人不忍。她原有機會安全留在英國,卻選擇回到法國共赴國難。1792年人民審判,她拒絕放棄對皇室效忠,被丟入暴民之中任意處置。據說她被性侵後開腸剝肚,頭顱被切下。暴民舉著她的身首想拿給囚室中的皇后看。皇后過於痛心而暈厥。在一些歷史插畫,常可以找到以她受辱情況為題的圖畫(見下圖)。


如果你對瑪莉安東尼皇后想進一步了解,以下英文網站值得一讀:

瑪莉皇后的女女傳聞後來越發不可收拾,原本只是政敵一旁捕風捉影,最後竟出現一位女子隔海在英國出版回憶錄,大言不慚自己是皇后的同性情人.這就是知名醜聞"Affair of the Diamond Necklace 鑽石項鍊事件"

話說瑪莉皇后的公公:路易十五,為了討好情婦Madame du Barry,向珠寶商Boehmer訂製豪華鑽石項鍊.不幸,作品尚未完成,路易十五就去世了.珠寶商希望剛繼任王位的路易十六夫婦能買下鑽石項鍊,以解決先前投資製作項鍊造成的財務危機.但是這一大串鑽石項鍊實在過於昂貴,就算皇室也不敢下手.

Boehmer等了好幾次機會勸購.第二次時機是皇后生下第一胎,皇后不是不了解國家情勢,馬上拒絕:"At that price we have more need of a ship of the line than a necklace."(這時候是買戰艦而不是買項鍊的節骨眼)珠寶商不死心,皇后生下男嬰,再度上前遊說.皇后仍然拒絕,而且勸他把項鍊拆解零售.但是散鑽的價值比不上整條項鍊,Boehmer的危機便被Comtesse de la Motte 莫特瓦洛女伯爵所利用.

女伯爵本名:Jeanne de Valois, Jeanne de Saint-Rémy-de Luz(1756–1791),號稱有皇室血統,她父親據說是法王亨利二世的私生子.因為沒有名份,Jeanne小時候生活貧困,一心想要取得貴族地位.她應付男人的身段高超,藉由一個一個入幕之賓,慢慢往上層階級發展.

1783年,她遇上Louis René Édouard de Rohan (1734–1803),人稱Cardinal de Rohan羅昂樞機主教.雖然名為主教,卻沒什麼道德情操.Jeanne成為他的情婦,發現主教急欲討好皇后.其實主教曾經散播過皇后的壞話,當然對他沒有好感.

Jeanne靠著先生在禁衛軍工作之便,以及與宮內秘書Retaux de Villette的床上關係,開始羅織騙局.她告訴主教能代為牽線至皇后,兩人可以秘密通信.主教為什麼相信Jeanne如此神通廣大?據說她當時便聲稱自己是皇后的同性戀人.那個時代只有同志被別人指控,還沒人敢自行出櫃,更何況外面的八卦傳單謠言滿天飛,可憐的主教信以為真,根本未警覺皇后的來信全是偽造.這一幫人甚至找來一個女演員喬裝成皇后,安排與主教月下夜會,暗示主教偷偷出錢買下鑽石項鍊送給皇室,皇后再用其他方式回報.

於是主教找來珠寶商,將項鍊交由Jeanne轉呈皇后.沒多久,項鍊被犯罪集團拆解四處零售.他們的如意算盤是就算主教發現,他只能啞巴吃黃蓮,不敢說出.可是珠寶商沒拿到錢,直接告狀到宮庭,犯罪集團連同主教一干人等全部被囚禁.

路易十六夫婦嚥不下這口悶氣,堅持公開審判.很多歷史證明,司法公義與社會觀感之間存有差異,公關操作確實會影響大眾輿論.當時的路易十六不明白現代政治包裝的技巧,雖然司法還給皇室清白,但大部份的民眾卻相信皇后的貞操定有污點,否則無風不起浪.

Jeanne採用玉石俱焚的策略,緊咬是皇后的同性戀人.瑪莉安東尼陌名其妙的同志身份變成法國大革命人人喊殺的罪名.拿破崙後來便說道:
    "The Queen's death must be dated from the Diamond Necklace Trial" (皇后的死期從審判鑽石項鍊事件開始倒數.)
Jeanne入獄前判處鞭刑,還被烙印.但是反皇黨人士幫助她逃出監禁,變裝成男人,坐船逃到英國.她沒有銷聲匿跡,反而出版回憶錄Mémoires justificatifs de la comtesse de Valois de La Motte,出一本還不夠,1789年接著出了第二本.這二本回憶錄為法國大革命搧風點火,皇后與Jeanne的同性戀情更是有理說不清.
    Amazon可以買到法文版 Volume 1, Volume 2,另外在Google Book亦可看得到.
這個女人樹大招風.1791年她從住家三樓墬落,傷重不治.死因成疑,變成懸案.皇后比她多撐了兩年,最後死在斷頭台上.

Affair of the Diamond Necklace 於2001年被好萊塢改編成同名電影,中譯片名為《亂世美女》由Hilary Swank 希拉蕊史旺主演,你可以比較電影的角度.


瑪莉安東尼是否有女女傾向?深宮向來寂寞,難免有幾次實驗,但要講「傾向」,似乎她的女女光譜不及於此.

在《凡爾賽拜金女》雖然不觸及女女傳聞,她和二位女伴確實常在一起,不論在Petit Trianon(小翠安儂宮/小提亞儂宮)裝扮成牧羊女,還是跑到化裝舞會尋歡作樂.我們在電影中沒有特別感覺,但有網友精心剪輯,原來她們就是一群惡女幫啊!

2010/08/08

Anna Madeley in Earthquakes in London

瑪姐姐最近忙著演舞台劇Earthquakes in London,我找到她在劇中的劇照.老實說,完全看不出來那就是她,看起來是個很奇怪的角色:



如果你想進一步了解,可參考Earthquakes in London英文官網

2010/08/05

Proposition 8 overturned by judge

或許美國加州的家務事與我們沒有關係,但就同性婚姻公眾議題,8號公投法案的正反攻防真是高潮不斷.我們以為同志陣營輸掉數人頭比賽(同志還是少數族群啊),沒想到再上訴,法院認為不准同性婚姻是違反美國憲法.但是別高興,還要送高等法院裁決.

這裡有一則最新出爐的中文新聞稿:

法官撤銷加州同性戀婚姻禁令 反對者將提上訴

時間:2010/8/5 08:12 (新聞引據:採訪、路透社)

美國聯邦地方法院首席法官華克(Vaughn Walker)4日裁定,加州禁止同性戀婚姻的8號提案(Proposition 8)違憲,理由是,諸多證據顯示,這項提案違反了美國憲法的平等保護權(equal-protection rights)與正當法律程序(due process);但是,在此案送交更高一級法院裁決前,8號提案仍然有效。

這是倡議同性戀者享有結婚權利人士的勝利,不過,支持與反對8號提案的兩派陣營事前都曾經揚言,無論聯邦地方法官如何裁決,他們都會提起上訴;因此,此案幾乎篤定將會被提交給最高法院審理。

同性戀者之間的婚姻究竟是否應該合法化,同性戀權益倡議人士與民權人士主張平等權,認為應該給予承認;然而,包括許多宗教保守人士在內的反對者認為,同性戀婚姻對傳統家庭構成威脅。

這項爭議引發加州社會激烈辯論,支持傳統婚姻的人士向州政府申請,將「婚姻是由一男一女組成」的條文納入加州憲法,並交付選民公投決定,「8號提案」由此而生;這項提案於2008年11月公投中獲得通過。此事激起民權與同性戀者團體的強烈反彈,支持與反對的雙方為此展開法律大戰。

加州州長阿諾史瓦辛格曾經表示,他個人支持同性戀婚姻,但他也遵從選民的意願與法院裁決。對於最新的法庭裁定,阿諾認為,這項決定確認了每個人所應獲得的充分保障。

目前,美國50個州中,有39個州明文禁止同性戀婚姻,其中30州還將它納入憲法;愛荷華州、康乃狄克州、新罕布什爾州、佛蒙特州、麻塞諸塞州以及哥倫比亞特區則是承認同性戀婚姻合法。

2010/08/04

Anne Lister Index


文章索引 (最近更新:2010/9/19)

Beyond The Drama of Anne Lister 系列
Part 1:二百年前日記的發掘與解密過程
Part 2:Lister Family,與二位舊情人-Eliza Raine, Isabella Norcliffe(Tip)
Part 3:Belcombe Family,Marianna出嫁
Part 4:1821~1822,Marianna婚後與Anne的戀情
Part 5:1824~1825,巴黎生活前情概要
Part 6:巴黎戀情的四位候選人-Mrs Barlow, Miss Pope, Mlle de Sans, Miss Mackenzie
Part 7:The Game for Two 與巴夫人的雙人遊戲
Part 8:Behind The Door 門後春光


Supplement A:從《明天是舞會 : 十九世紀法國女性的時尚生活 》看十九世紀中上階層的婚姻與經濟
Supplement B:法國大革命的恐同迫害插曲-瑪莉皇后的女女傳聞
Supplement C:瑪莉皇后姊姊的女女傳聞

播映前追蹤報導:
The Secret Diaries Of Miss Anne Lister Trailer:2010/5/25
The Secret Diaries Of Miss Anne Lister DVD pre-order:2010/5/6
The First Hand News: The Secret Diaries of Miss Anne Lister premiere:2010/3/19
The Secret Diaries Of Miss Anne Lister will premiere on 17 March:2010/2/10
The Secret Diaries Of Miss Anne Lister:2009/11/12

2010/08/02

Beyond the drama of Anne Lister:Part 7

The Game for Two

要說Anne Lister是個花心的人,有時不太公允.她知道貿然下手的風險,大部份時間僅止於耍嘴皮子,一付「色大膽小怕狗咬」,全等對方主動.她採取故作清純的策略,以靜制動.

巴夫人雖然結過婚,而且男伴不少,但女女潛力遠比我們想像的深厚.善用別人的同志傳聞,或是同志典故來試探,讓Anne暗自竊喜.巴夫人步步放寬親密界線,在小地方讓Anne吃儘甜頭,她認為破冰時刻,指日可待.

巴夫人的動機,除了感情因素,還有經濟的考量.而Anne對巴夫人的態度,卻非考量長期關係,而是貪圖短暫激情.我對Anne不太能諒解之處,她內心常常認為巴夫人別有企圖,但自己又心口不一致,給對方錯誤的期待.我比較古板,認為這樣為人有失厚道.

1824/10/14,巴夫人用法國皇后Marie Antoinette(瑪莉安東尼)的女女傳聞來測試Anne的態度:
    Somehow she began talking of that one of the things of which Marie Antoinette was accused of was being too fond of women. I, with perfect mastery of countenance, said I had never heard of it before and could not understand or believe it. . . . I said I would not believe such a thing existed. (Anne面不改色,說是從沒聽過這等事.請注意,她並非指沒聽過瑪莉皇后的女女情,而是指從沒聽過西方曾有同志存在.....這也裝得太過火了!)

我不記得Sofia Coppola(蘇菲亞柯波拉)的作品《凡爾賽拜金女》曾有這段情節,還找出DVD重新再看一次.柯波拉小姐的青春搖滾詮釋招來白眼,不過她壓根沒想去招惹瑪莉皇后雙性戀的爭議.

當時有本未授權回憶錄用諷刺的方式提到她的女女偏好,有興趣者可詳見:Rictor Norton (Ed.), Memoirs of Antonina [Marie Antoinette] 1791", Homosexuality in Eighteenth-Century England: A Sourcebook, 24 July 2002.

我對這本書略有保留.畢竟法國大革命的氛圍對瑪莉皇后極不友善.女女偏好可能是抹黑她的手段之一.就算她真是雙性戀,她的情慾私領域亦會跟著她的歷史評價一起陪葬.

    Mrs Barlow said it was mentioned in scripture, not in the New Testament not Deuteronomy, nor Leviticus. I said I believe that when reduced to the last extremity — I was going to mention the use of phalli but luckily Mrs Barlow said, 'You mean two men being fond of each other?' & I said 'Yes' . . .(巴夫人馬上拆穿,聖經裡早有提及同志,她怎麼會不知道.Anne正準備辯解,剛好巴夫人接話,那是指男人喜歡男人....)
    I declared I was the most innocent person in the world concerning all I had seen & heard, for everybody told me things. She said she should not have mentioned it but she knew she was not telling me anything I did not know before. I said I read of women being too fond of each other in the Latin parts of the works of Sir William Jones. . . . (Anne故作清純,這些不正經的事都是別處聽來、看來的.巴夫人才不理會她的清純無知說.Anne只好提到,在威廉瓊斯的作品中看到一些女女情事.)
    In fact, she suspected me and she was fishing to find it out but I think I was too deep for her. . . . She is a deepish hand & I think, would not be sorry to gain me over, but I shall be on my guard..(Anne懷疑巴夫人故意套問她,慶幸自己城府夠深.她開始產生被迫害妄想症,警覺不要陷入巴夫人的圈套.)
Anne對巴夫人又怕又愛,喊了幾百遍要小心,還不是自投羅網.反正Anne就喜歡和巴夫人聊天.次日,巴夫人繼續出擊,連女同小說都出現了.
    10/15:She then shewed me the little book the gentleman had left here for her, 'Voyage a Plombieres', P.126, where is the story of one woman intriging with another. She has lent me the book....(巴夫人拿出一本別的男客送給她的小說,其中便有描述到一段女同故事.我很好奇,那本書有沒有收錄到Fingersmith李老先生的索引裡.)
Anne不斷強調自已注重純友誼,同時很技巧地拋出一段話恭維巴夫人:
    [I] said I was half in love with Mlle de Sans but if I had appointed to go with her & was with Mrs Barlow, I could not keep the appointment. But if sitting with Mlle de Sans I could leave her to go to Mrs Barlow. Mrs Barlow has more tact, more power over me.....(她對珊小姐的情份只有五成,如果與珊小姐有約,卻在巴夫人身旁,她可不想離開;如果與巴夫人有約,卻在珊小姐身旁,她會抽身赴約.因為巴夫人對她的影響力更大.....嘴巴真甜啊!)
    I joked & said if I was my father's son I shold be sure I was in love with her - should know what was the matter with me. She said I was crazy, at the same time looking as if she wished to mead me on. [I] laughed & said I was not a accustomed to this sort of thing - should take pills or salts, etc.(Anne繼續天花亂墬,如果她是男兒身,一定會拜倒在巴夫人裙下.巴夫人樂得回灌迷湯.Anne故意承受不起,說要嗅鹽還是吞藥來提神醒腦.Anne真是交際高手,兩人的對話好像在MSN的打情罵俏.)
但同時間,她的理智又不斷提醒自己,巴夫人越靠越近了,懷疑她是何居心?
    .....She sat next me in the evening & every now  & then I felt her near me, touching me. My knees, my toes or something.....(晚上相談,巴夫人常常貼近而坐,碰碰Anne的膝蓋,摸摸她的腳趾....天曉得還有那個部位?)
    I really must be on my guard. What can she mean? Is she really amoureuse? This from a widow & mother like her is more than I could have thought of. I am safer with Mlle de Sans.....I keep telling her she is too deep, too knowing, for me.....She had said before, this house was a little world & I should think so if I had seen all she had. I begin to think so already.(Anne認為要小心.誰知道巴夫人的真正企圖?巴夫人可以成為情人嗎?Anne從沒考慮過寡婦而且是一個孩子的媽.和珊小姐在一起比較安全吧.Anne一直告訴巴夫人,她的境界太高了,高攀不起.而且巴夫人提過,這個旅館人多嘴雜,Anne應該多打探對方底細.)
巴夫人出招,Anne怯懦不應:
    10/17:She put her arm round me. I might have kissed her but contented myself with shaking hands.(巴夫人圍抱她,Anne心想親回去,卻雙手發抖不敢動.)
終於有了第一個吻,只是過程有點辛苦:
    10/19:Lord bless me, 'tis plain enough she would not allow me to go on in this manner, nor would she put herself so in my way if she did not like it. Just before her going, I put my arm round her waist & tried to pull her on my knee, she resisted & I gave up & apologized. I asked if she was angry as she went out. She said, 'No', & was giving me her lips to kiss when she recollected & suddenly turned her cheek, which I kissed, saying ' Why did you not do as you were going to do?' I had told her before I wished she could stay all night with me & if she wre at Shibden she could, to which she made no objection.....(其實巴夫人已鋪好紅地毯,只是Anne一直猶豫如何走上去.終於,Anne在巴夫人準備離去的關鍵時刻,她伸手環抱對方的腰想拉來坐在膝上.我覺得這個招式有點突兀,巴夫人第一個反應並沒有順從.Anne只好道歉問對方有沒有生氣.巴夫人大概是認為笨拙吧.換成由她作勢要吻,卻突然半途轉面,Anne則趁機親上她的臉頰.Anne問她,妳怎麼不做完要吻我的動作呢?她曾對巴夫人提到,如果妳在我的老家,我會要求妳整晚和我在一起.在一起做什麼?之前Anne提起過夜,可能是指促膝長談.後來不斷提起過夜,就沒那麼簡單.)
    10/20: ....She observed my wedding ring. [I] said this ought to bind me but this was pure friendship & I began to dread the influence that was greater.(巴夫人注意到Anne手上的訂情戒子,Anne推說那是純友誼--鬼才相信.她開始擔心這會壞了好事.不過,事後Anne會發現那是離開巴夫人的好藉口.)
    I perpetually plead my want of vanity to persuade myself it is possible for her to care for me. She little knows who she has to deal with. Before all this, I had laughed & joked & declared I would go to Italy and try the experiment, that is, get a woman there. She knew what I meant -(Anne不斷以滿足自我虛榮來,說服自己,深信巴夫人會愛上她.因為巴夫人根本不知交手的是何許人物.她對巴夫人開玩笑,會去義大利好好實驗.「實驗」的意思是去找個女人.我不懂為什麼是義大利,好像所有「敗德」情慾都發生在義大利.)
她們開始有過火的小動作,而且巴夫人最愛在情敵珊小姐的跟前偷偷進行:


    10/21While with Mlle de Sans, she (Mrs Barlow) let me have my hand up her petticoats almost to her knee. At last, she whispered, 'Do not yet.' She afterwards let me do it nearly as high. She had before taken away her legs once or twice but always put them back again. (晚餐時,Anne坐在巴夫人和珊小姐之間.巴夫人讓她的手伸進襯裙內摸到膝蓋.巴夫人一度低語制止她,但還是讓她起手.巴夫人有時承受不了,雙腿開展過一兩回,但最後還是回到淑女的坐姿.....哎呀,追求激情不是年輕人的特權,新戀情永遠讓人回復青春.)
正以為她們漸入佳境,兩人突然煞車,覺得發展太快:
    10/22:Said I felt quite ashamed of myself. Was determined to get the better of the thing & insinuated it would be Mrs Barlow's fault if I behaved foolishly again....Was not accustomed to this sort of folly. (Anne說自己少不更事,把責任推到巴夫人,都是她引誘小女子啦.)
巴夫人改採以進為退的策略,她也希望關係正常化,能有個正當名份:
    10/25:At last she said she was low. I asked why. She seemed ready to cry & said she thought she, too, was a little crazy....At last she said, 'If I adored you I would not live with you in this way. I would rather marry you.'....She said she could not bear to lose her own esteem & I should not love long what I did not respect. (巴夫人開始憂心忡忡,擔心這種激情不能常久,不被珍惜,於是提議結婚.哇,那時候的婚姻觀挺先進的.)
巴夫人認為同性婚姻可行,當時反而是Anne推三阻四,完全不像最後與Ann Walker結婚的氣勢.:
    I owned this. 'But,' said I, 'if I could propose your settling at Shibden &, of course, made you understand on what terms?' 'Oh,' said she, 'I must be respected by the world.' 'So you would,' said I. 'Well but,' said she, 'what would your friends [think]?' 'Oh,' said I, 'only that you were a new friend. I could easily manage this.' 'Ah,' 'said she, 'that I would not like. It would have been better had you been brought up as your father's son.' I said, 'No, you mistake me. It would not have done at all. I could not have married & should have been shut out from ladies' society. I could not have been with you as I am.' 'But,' said she, 'you would have taken your chance with the rest.' She meant of gentlemen. (Anne很好奇巴夫人對於被帶進門的意義為何?噢,她會感到被尊重.可是巴夫人反問妳的親友會怎麼想?Anne馬上變膽小,只敢佯裝是普通朋友,容易矇混過去.巴夫人不太滿意,妳得像個男人扛起來啊.Anne趕快解釋,妳高估我了,這完全辦不到.我不可能和妳結婚,我會被逐出仕女圈.以現在的我,不可能和妳長相廝守.巴夫人這下沒有安全牌,指著Anne:妳將來可能會找個男人嫁了.)
那一天,巴夫人幾乎要以眼淚收場,Anne被迫離去.次日當兩人走在杜樂莉公園,她提到第一眼看到Anne,以為是位男士:
    10/26:She said I astonished Mme Galvani at first, who once or twice said to the Mackenzies she thought I was a man & the Macks too had wondered. Mrs Barlow herself had thought at first wished to imitate the manners of a gentleman but now she knows me better, it was not put on. (Anne剛到旅館,至少有兩位房客誤以為她是男士.巴夫人誤會Anne是在模仿男士的舉止,後來進一步認識,才放棄那種想法.按照現代的說法,這就是T的特質.)
      She said she was low. She longed to have a home. [I] reminded her she might marry when she likes. She said she might if she had not shut herself up so many years. She likes attention & had not much from the men tonight. After waiting a while she said nobody had given her a word. Of course I gave her one directly. She would not suit me. I would tire of her - but flirting with her amuses me now.(晚上,巴夫人情緒低落,她坦言想要擁有家庭.Anne回嘴,只要妳想要就去找個歸宿.巴夫人則說自己封閉已久,引不起別人的注意.於是Anne就陪她打情罵俏.但Anne的內心再度出現可怕的獨白:她根本不適合我.有天我會厭倦她,但是現在和她調情讓我有點樂子.....唉,這不太厚道.)
    這個旅館的確人多嘴雜,沒多久Anne聽到有關巴夫人的流言:
      10/29: ....M. de Bellevue whispered to her the other night, 'Saint Enis touch', according to the sound, meaning sly, a saint in public but not in private.....'Well,' said I to myself, 'what hands have I got into? How to get out again? let this be a lesson for the future.'(哇,人前是聖女,人後是蕩婦!嚇得Anne緊張,為什麼招惹到這號人物?怎麼脫身?如何反範未然?)
    Anne後來遇到巴夫人,用了一個很啼笑皆非的例子,間接說明她不會娶巴夫人--因為Anne也很喜歡珊小姐,但就是不會娶對方:
      Should have been in love with her(珊小姐) if I had been a man, but would not have married her. Would only have married an Englishwoman. Would not mix the blood......I was proud of my country.(如果我是男人,我會愛上珊小姐,但我不會娶她,只會娶英國女人.我不會混淆血統....我很熱愛祖國.天呀,Anne是被嚇壞腦筋嗎,這是什麼爛理由?)
      What would Marianna say to all this if she knew? I am indeed unable, it seems, to take care of myself with women. I am always getting into some scrape with them. If Mrs Barlow did not like me she would not let me talk & do as I do. But no more, I shall be in the mire if I don't take care. (Anne突然想念起Marianna,難怪會被對方看扁.Anne承認不會應付女人,老是陷入麻煩.但她也認為巴夫人是喜歡她,才會讓她為所欲為.最後又提醒自己千萬要小心.)
    其實,喊再多小心都沒有用:
      11/3:In wishing her goodnight she quietly let me put my arms around her waist & gently press her & very gently kiss her. She stood, too, with her right thigh a little within my left, in contact - which she has never permitted before. She likes me certainly.(道別的時候,牽牽小手,親親一吻...都不算什麼.巴夫人同意她越線近身:兩人雙腿互相交錯貼近....)
      11/4:[Mrs Barlow] often looks at my gold rings & just presses them on my finger. She had done so tonight. Said I, 'I know you often think of those rings. Perhaps you attach too much importance to them & i too little.' She asked if I had described the friend who gave them. I somehow said, 'No.' 'Ah,' said she, 'she is your dearest friend. You told me it was Mrs Lawton. You told me wrong then.' To this I mad no answer....(巴夫人覺得Anne的戒子很礙眼,直追問贈送者的來歷.Anne本想閃躲,卻被猜中就是Marianna.)
      What Would Marianna say? She has not written to me of too long.(典型地找舊愛討論新歡.Anne納悶老情人為何都沒來信,趕快寫信來,可有個人商量!)
    她們又討論起是否適合結婚,巴夫人自謙條件不好,配不上Anne.可是Anne用了另一種邏輯,既能安撫巴夫人,又能免於自己被逼婚.
      11/5:....'But there are two, & only two, things. You have been married - you must make comparisons. it is impossible you should love me well enough. And there is the thought of those rings, which does come across my conscience. But you could not love me well enough. You must make comparisons.' She merely answered, 'You do not know me.'.....I said the best thing for me would be her marrying.(我們不適合結婚的原因有兩點:妳結過婚,會比較,不可能愛我多過前夫;妳比我還會惦記我的戒子,妳一定會計較,不可能多愛我一點.巴夫人雖然想反駁,Anne一句話想打死結婚的念頭:妳嫁個好人家,對妳我都好.)
    Anne要巴夫人再嫁,不表示她就了無慾望,而是手照摸,臉照親:
      11/7: Kissed her in a little dark passage as we came out of the dining room. She let me kiss her now very quietly & sits with her feet close to mine....If I had a penis, tho' of but small length, I should surely break the ice some of these times, before I go.(兩人常常把握機會搞小動作,例如經過一段光線不亮的穿廊就偷親一下.兩人靠近坐著,腳就偷偷挨著.Anne暗自得意,她要是有個陽具,在離開巴黎之前,一定能破冰而出.好個登徒子的心聲?)
    和珊小姐等人一同去看戲,Anne和巴夫人一找到機會就摸摸茶:
      11/9:Under our shawls, had my arm round her waist great part of the time.(在影集一開場,Anne與披著長巾的Marianna在林中牽手.在巴黎,趁著披巾掩飾之便,Anne一路挽著巴夫人的柳腰而行.)
      11/10I asked if she would burn my letters [if they corresponded at a later date]. She said she would do whatever I asked her. I thanked her, saying I would then write more at ease, assured that she would destroy all that it might be imprudent to keep.(Anne沒有教導巴夫人學會暗號,於是她要求巴夫人如果未來雙方通信,請把她的信件燒掉,免得擔心有後遺症,無法暢所欲言.唉,其實Anne對巴夫人從頭到尾就不想有「後遺症」.)
      Speaking of her good figure & pretty hand and of her foot, asked her to let me span her ancle. She refused. I said I was contented she should refuse me this now but could not bear it if we were always together. 'Oh,' said she, 'then it would be a different thing.' She now stands nearer to me when I kiss her, yet she always withdraws the moment it becomes that I am excited. She certainly know how to gain one's affections. (Anne正在讚賞巴夫人的好身材,突然要求握握對方的足踝.人家當然拒絕.Anne大言不慚,現在被拒沒關係,如果未來在一起,會令人受不了.巴夫人回答,到那時候當然就不一樣.在這個階段,她還能夠欲擒故縱:Anne親吻她時,靠近一點,但當Anne開始興奮便抽身而去.Anne知道這種撩撥的遊戲.等到Anne的慾望越來越強烈,巴夫人根本無從拒絕,只能一起捲入慾火.)

     
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